Soulslaughter-A poem
69I´ve felt fulfilled, elated, with all the brothers and sisters I have met here during my short stay. I have shared all that I know about life and the spirit, and it has been well received by all of you, my deepest thanks!
Just three days away from my birthday, I find myself at a crossroad and I know, by God, I know that my choice will be my responsibility, which I humbly assume. Do not be mistaken, my brothers and sisters, I have suffered a fall, and I will lie quietly on the ground until the pain has subsided, and then, as a phoenix bird, I shall rise myself again from the ashes.
Why do I write this and not disappear without a trace? Because I love you all very much, and there are many wondrous people here that I owe words of thankfulness, praise and admiration. You know who you are.
You have felt it through my words and my treatment to you. I am happy to say that I leave with no enemies, for I just offered friendship and I got friendship back.Do not worry, my brothers and sisters, for I am not ill, my health is fine. I will leave you with a poem that I didn´t want to publish at HP because it is too dark, but it bespeaks of what I am feeling right now…
Thank You for being my friends…
Warmest regards and infinite heavenly blessings,
I LOVE YOU ALL,
Al
I am mystifying my purpose of living
pouring all my soul out of its countenance
strangling my desires, being unforgiving
invisible fingers, imposing my penance
A broken cross in my right hand, two daggers in my left
my east marks my calvary, my west, my destination
my odd side bent on mutilation,
my even one, making me bereft
The battlefield, hidden from the human sight
the shrills of voices in the abyss, I can hear
my outer shell reflects a funeral sardonic rite,
my concealed fray creating its own bliss out of my fear
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Oh! damned be my brute and grieving calamity
brought by my own soulless and deafened choice
drowning in this godlessness, my poisoned voice
offering me pain, loneliness and demons ´amity
Raise your bladed, foul and darkened hand
smiting the silver chord my heaving carcass binds,
take the spoils of war, your gruesome, coveted finds
fulfill your unholy prophecy right here where I stand
…though I warn you on feeling elated: I shall be reborn
in the righteousness of Light and the godliness you
have just desecrated…
Pain washes away dross and chaff like a flood of a thousand oceans. It is not a feeling to be sought, but understood. Becoming one with pain, letting it carve you inside like a hungry parasite, and then letting it go, shall increase strength, determination, but above all, it brings forth peace.
That Oneness with the whole, with the Universe, with the godliness within that makes one an ever increasing ripple of harmony and comprehension. Let´s learn from the Lotus flower that emerges from the darkest and muddiest water around it....
Copyright ©Mystique®2010
Copyright ©Alberto J. Alvarez G.®2010
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My Brother Tony...
Thank you, Thank you for your kind and warm words, they mean a lot to me. Do not worry, my friend, I shall not leave for good. I just need time to reassess certain principles that I have failed to see. Poetry helps you drain, you know that! Better on a poem than on myself, or others. I will just commit to rearrange my hubs and comment others, but will not be taking time to write new ones yet.
Thanks again, my brother! Your support has been tremendous and I cherish that! Be well!
Warmest regards and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Al: You sound as if your heart was broken. :( I hope you are just taking a break and not leaving for good! As you know we are in a world of duality so there will be an ebb and flow, but you will shine again, hope you start writing again soon!
Al, whatever your problem is, hope that it releases you soon. Maybe we can't recognize light without experiencing darkness. In this simple vehicle (HP) you have shared a lot of light and introduced light into the hearts of your readers. Allow the grace that you have spread be reflected back into your heart. Don't wallow in the darkness but pull yourself up by your bootstraps because you know the way! Peace and love to you dear Al!
beautiful powerful emotional terrific poem god speed its great thanks
Mystique, I don't know what may have put you into a dark place but nothing is permanent in life you you will again live in the light before all is said and done. I surely hope you don't leave Hub Pages as I have very much enjoyed so many great hubs you've written and all your wonderful comments. There is nothing that you can ask God that he won't do for you. He says we have not because we ask not. God Bless you.
I hope what ever is troubling you passes soon. You are a good hubber friend. I always read your comments even on other peoples hubs. You are full of wisdom. Your writting is beautiful.
very good and beautiful,my friend. You always come with your soul and pure heart. It represent your poem. Thumbs up and I rate this. Good to see you again.
Prasetio
Painfully beautiful not dark at all. There is beauty and light in the dark. Well wishes to you my friend. Hope to see you again.
Al - This is Beautiful!
I don't know where you are going or what you are going to do but rest assured that you are in my prayers.
I wish you well and I wish you rainbows!
God bless!
Beautiful poem! I wish you much happiness. I will remember you in my prays.
My dearest Marie...
Thank you for your support. I know, Sister! I know you are there! I´ve come back a lot stronger! It had to happen!
Warmest hugs and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Dearest Dolores...
Thank you for being there when I needed it! I am perfectly ok now, but I did not want to live your comments without answers. I am happy to have you as a friend!
Warmest hugs, love and light, and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Thank you, thevoice...
I am pleased you came around and saw the beauty beyond sadness. God Bless you, my brother!
Warmest hugs and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Ah! My dearest Pam...
I am back and better than ever. I had decided that I wouldn´t answer this hub until I felt right. Didn´t want to write dark feelings! Thank you for your support! Your friendship is cherished!
Warmest hugs and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Sorry to see you leave. You are a splendid writer and I also admire your intelligent perception of things... I hope you come back to the hub but if not I wish you well.. May The Creator keep you safe
Oh No, My dearest Sister...
See, this hub was published 3 days before my birthday(May 17) I did leave for 10 days. I came back strong, with all The Power and Love of the Great Architect within me! Thanks for your concern! I shall be here!
Warmest hugs and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Granny´s house...
Thank you so much for your support, at present I am doing perfectly, thanks to The Great Architect, we are definitely well connected, and I couldn´t live without HIM.
Warmest hugs and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
Deep words Al. I hope the sun has dawned again upon you by now. Take care.
My Brethren Joshua...
I have been reborn, after deeper pain drowned me, I´m finally beginning to detach from the murderous ego that put me there in the first place. I can see the Light and its blinding glitter is singing victory!
Warmest hugs and infinite heavenly blessings,
Al
tonymac04 2 years ago
Wow, Al! This sure is dark. I don't know what is battering your soul like this and I know I might not understand it. Please though know that you are a lovely person full of light and godliness!
I really hope you find your way out of this really soon! I am next to you in spirit, at least.
And I hnope you do not leave Hubpages for good. Your presence here has meant a lot to me and many, many others!
Love and peace
Tony